# 2-01, Friday October 7, 1994

• O.J. Clue
  New, from Parkers Brothers!
• Herb Gray--CSIS
  Mr. Excitment discusses CSIS while being robbed.
• Betteman Hockey
  NHL Commissioner Gary Betteman talks about the hockey negotiations.
• Mall Mart
  The employees attempt to explain how Canadian they are.
• Wallin/Parizeau
  News anchor Pamela Wallin interviews Quebec Premier Jacques Parizeau.
• Ottawa Private Eye
  A private dick visits Ottawa and realizes that he's not the first 'dick' to arrive here.
• The Pope
  The Pope tries to modernize his image.
• Canadian Moment
  
• Sweatin' To The Top Stories
  Richard Simmons exercises to the top news events.

# 2-02, Friday October 14, 1994

• Cult Pitch
  The "Institute for Religious Fanatics" leader preaches about the benefits of joining a cult.
• Sandi and Saddam
  Sandi Rinaldo interviews Saddam Hussein about the Kuwait invasion.
• Canadian Moment
• Sheila Shelley
  The gossip queen rants about the Madonna stamp, sex surveys, Der Nudie boys, dinosaurs and the Blue Jays exercise tape.
• Koshers Korner
• Royal Sentry
  A Royal Sentry has a royal problem on his hands.
• Prairie Movie Ban
  Two farmers talk about all the movies that disgust them that they'd like to see banned.
• Preston Manning Town Hall Meeting
  Reform party leader Preston Manning tries to hold a televised forum that turns into a bad home shopping show.

# 2-03, Friday October 21, 1994

• Bouchard Debates Clark
  Bloc quebecois leader Lucien Bouchard and former cabinet minister Joe Clark debate national unity.
• Photo Radar
  A couple get even with the new photo radar system using a camera.
• Prince Charles Confesses
  Charles admits he never loved Diana, and more.
• Mr. Taxpayer
• Sportsless Network
  Two sportscasters attempt to fill half an hour with no sports news.
• Atwood Commercial
  Having trouble sleeping? Try a new natural sleep aid...
• Aphazard Dinosaurs
  Lessons on dinosaurs with a 90's twist: Don Cherry, Sharon Stone, Barney.
• Tiny Mike and Paul Martin
  Tiny Mike discusses Paul Martin's changes to Canada's taxes and their effect on food.
• Aristide Takes Office
  A mountie mocks the Haitian leader as he compliments Canada.
• Supreme Court Ruling
  A woman on the street reacts to a recent Supreme Court ruling that drunkenness is a defense of rape.

# 2-04, Friday October 28, 1994

• Queen Speaks Out
  Queen Elizabeth chronicles her family's history in her new book, "Hot, Horny and Inbred".
• Manning Hallowe'en
  Preston Manning receives some trick or treaters into his home.
• Pirates Canada
• Three Tenors
  The three tenors--Luciano Pavarotti, Placido Domingo and the other guy--sing their favourite songs.
• Where Are They Now?
  John Crosby, Kim Campbell and Joe Clark discuss what they miss most about being in power. Brian Mulroney pops in at the end.
• Rita MacNeil and Closet Elvis
  Herb Gray gets some advice from Closet Elvis and the real Rita MacNeil.
• Chretien on PTN
  Pamela Wallin interviews the Prime Minister and gets some surprising answers.
• Hockey Withdrawal
  A woman attempts to bring her husband out of a comatose state brought on by the hockey strike.

# 2-05, Friday November 4, 1994

• Marchi Announcement
  Immigration Minister Sergio Marchi explains his new immigration plan.
• Chretien--China
• Canadian moment
  The doughnut shop gang discusses gun control, Mulroney and the deficit.
• President Clinton Address
  The President speaks out on armed aggression while dodging gunfire.
• High Speed Commentary
  A signing translator has trouble keeping up with the "News For The Fast Of Hearing" commentator.
• Videopinion--Clamp
• Gun Shop
  A gun shop owner is robbed four times.
• Well Dressed Fireman
  Before taking a fire alarm call, a fireman wants to avoid any fashion faux pas'.
• CBC Studio Tour
  CBC executive Delbert Phipps proves that the CBC is a cost efficient organization.

# 2-06, Friday November 11, 1994

• War Veteran Poppy Seller
  A poppy seller makes his customers feel very guilty.
• Canadian Moment
  The group discusses Chretien in China, Alzheimers and the Immigration & Refugee board.
• Special Bulletin--Copps
  Sheila Copps becomes mad with power while Chretien is in China.
• Muscle Pigs
  Non-viloent pigs fight crime and replace "power rangers".
• Parizeau Address
  Quebec Premier Jacques Parizeau tries to come up with a date for the Referendum.
• NHL Saturday Night
  The top ten things that players want are discussed.
• Member For Kicking Horse Pass
  The honourable member examines diced carrots, gun control and O.J. Simpson on television.
• Stumpy Tom Conway
  One legged Stumpy sings his song, "I'm moving to the USA"

# 2-07, Friday November 18, 1994

• Eagleson Hearing
  Alan Eagleson greets the investigating panel with some presents.
• Washroom Ladder Rental
  An entrepreneurial Canadian rents ladders in a men's washroom.
• China Visitor Recovers
  A hung over Chretien rants about his political colleague in his hotel room.
• Tommy
  A promo for the new musical.
• Bouchard On Impact
  Bloc Quebecois Leader Lucien Bouchard consults his good and evil sides.
• Convict Boy
  Nobody is better at furniture and appliances, Nooooooobody!
• Queen's Luncheon Party
  The Queen's mother has too much to drink at a luncheon where the Queen gives advice to her son Charles.
• Pope Speech
  The Pope looks back at some of the historical errors of the past like the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, etc to apologize.
• Warning Label Cigarettes
  Customer tries to decide on a pack of cigarettes based on its warning label.
• Videopinion--Body Piercing
  An old lady defends the practice of body piercing.

# 2-08, Friday November 25, 1994

• Quintuplets Movie
  The real story of the Dionne family, when Mrs Dionne delivers 143 babies.
• Manning Address
  Leader of the Reform Party Preston Manning discusses the appointment of Romeo LeBlanc.
• Canadian Vampire
  Luba is visted by a polite, docile Canadian vampire.
• Grey Cup Fans
• Airborne Regiment Commercial
  A member of the airborne appeals to all dysfunctional violents to join the regiment.
• Rinaldo Interview Baggley
  Funeral home director Hector Baggley discusses euthenasia.
• Car Weasel
  The ultimate in protection from car thieves.
• Jock McBile
  Jock weighns in on the political repression of refugees, the Via Rail flambé, pensions vs gambling and ethnic groups.
• Sweatin' To The Top Stories
  Richard Simmons and his plump companions sweat it out over Alan Eagleson, the Grey Cup, NHL lockout, University tuitions, Immigration and refugees and Luncheon meat.
• Jo Jo's Psychic Alliance
  Jo Jo comes up against the toughest mind to read, Mike from Canmore.

# 2-09, Friday December 2, 1994

• VIA Safety Demo
  A safety instruction demonstrates that VIA Rail is not all that safe.
• Canadian Moment
  Straight talk on gum/gun control, US vs Canada (assassinate vs re-elect), Chrétien in France, Bruce McNall, Jeffrey Dahlmer and Toronto disaster.
• Dave The Beer Guy
  Dave displays his latest products--Mousse Head Beer, Pissed as a Newt Ale, etc.
• This Day In History
  French and English explorers arrive in the new world to find Graham Greene waiting for them.
• Blind Willy Feldman
  Blind Willy sings the blues because his "toaster is broke".
• Member For Kicking Horse Pass
  The member looks at the Grey Cup and our knowledge of the U.S. (Dan Quayle, Oklahoma, and Alan Eagleson).
• Bosnia Hostages
  Canadian peacekeepers are stuck in Bosnia without food or supplies until Hendrix saves the day--with a Christmas tree.

# 2-10, Friday December 9, 1994

• Chretien Travel
  Chretien lets loose at "Club Fed".
• PTN Bacteria
  Pamela Wallin interviews a bacterium.
• Politically Correct Christmas
  The story from the ages with a new, politically-correct, twist.
• News From Away With Jimmy & Seamus O'Toole
  The two Newfoundlanders talk about Parizeau, Bosnia, increased interest rates, oil at Windsor castle and the Cod stocks.
• Red Green Christmas Shopping
  Red Green shows you how to make your own Christmas angel.
• Siskel & Ebert
• Season's Greeting--Sheila Copps
  Sheila Copps belts out a moving rendition of "Silent Night".

Instant Classics # 1, Friday January 6, 1995

• O.J. Clue (#2-01, October 7, 1994)
• High Speed Commentary (#2-05, November 4, 1994)
• Three Tenors (#2-04, October 28, 1994)
• Atwood Commercial (#2-03, October 21, 1994)
• Queen Speaks Out (#2-04, October 28, 1994)
• Cult Pitch (#2-02, October 14, 1994)
• Interview With A Canadian Vampire (#2-08, November 25, 1994)
• Photo Radar (#2-03, October 21, 1994)
• Dionne Quintuplets (#2-08, November 25, 1994)
• Washroom Ladder Rental (#2-07, November 18, 1994)

# 2-11, Friday January 13, 1995

• Betteman
  "Hackey" negotiator Bettman is interviewed by Michael Landesberg about the end of the hockey lockout.
• Canadian Moment
  Around the doughnut table: Christmas, turkeys on steroids, old age security, native taxes, Lucien Bouchard's return, the new politically correct bible and anal retentives.
• Mister Rogers' Cablehood
  This week on Mister Rogers' Cablehood, special guest Keith "Mr. CRTC" Spicer explains cable monopolies.
• Wendy Mesley Cable TV Report
  Pirate John, president of Jolly Roger's cable, is interviewed while guest commentator Gilbert Smythe Bite-Me discusses the latest offering of specialty channels.
• Chechnya
  Yeltsin discovers that Chechnya wants to separate.
• NHL Player Roomie
  Piano barfly sings about his old love.

#2-12, Friday , January 20, 1995

• Dave Hodge Inside Sports
• Chretien visits South America
• PTN - Airborne
• Ralph Klein Fireside Chat
• Confidential News Network
• Manning and By Election Candidate
• Jock McBile

#2-13, Friday January 27, 1995

• Newsworld O.J. Report
  Suit analyst Nick Cadalina assesses the wardrobe of the OJ trial.
• Chretien's Postcard From Argentina
  Prime Minister Chretien talks trade and meets Juan Valdez.
• Military Merchandising
  The military's latest attempt to generate revenue (features the Chicken Cannon).
• Canadian Moment
  The gang discuss lotteries, the superbowl, Guy Paul Morin and DNA and Parizeau in Paris.
• RSP Commercial
• Newfoundland Lighthouse
  Ottawa wants to automate the lighthouse keepers.
• Chretien's Postcard From Chile
  Jean meets a low key Chilean vice-president.

#2-14, Friday February 3, 1995

• News From Away With Jimmy & Seamus O'Toole
  'De bhoys' discuss Parliament tunnels, the OJ trial, the Brady Bunch and licensing fees for using the RCMP image.
• Groundhog Day
  Groundhog Kitchener Karen talks about her shadow.
• Political Rich Couple
  Bermuda residents Humphrey and Vanessa insist they have a fidelity to Canada (from abroad).
• Prime Time News
  Peter Mansbridge and Wendy Mesley, in a contest of literal one-up(wo)manship.
• Jock McBile
• Rita and Friends
  Rita sings about the "working man from the east coast" who "likes his eggs with juice and toast." She's joined by special guest Luciano Pavarotti.
• Member For Kicking Horse Pass

#2-15, Friday February 10, 1995

• Chretien, Clinton & Yeltsin
  Three leaders, in silhouette, discuss the differences in their countries.
• Sally Struthers--Jobs
• Tiny Mike--Parliament Resumes
  Tiny Mike chats with Sheila Copps, Herb Gray and Paul Martin.
• Gilbert Smythe Bite-Me
  Gilbert Smythe Bite-Me demonstrates how confusing cable channels are becoming.
• Canadian Moment
  The gan discuss tax breaks, military cutbacks and sovereignty.
• Inept Carpenter
  A one armed carpenter tries to nail two pieces of wood together.
• Trans Canada Debt
  A majestic look at Canada's debt.
• Big Bum Mountie
  A clumsy overweight Mountie is untouchable, literally.
• Lottery Line-Up
  Some people in an unemployment lineup are preoccupied with the lottery.

#2-16, Friday February 17, 1995

• Manning--National Tax Alert
  Preston Manning does his best Robert DeNiro--'You taxin' me?'
• CTV News--Blind Willy Feldman
  Blind Willy sings the blues with news anchor Sandi Rinaldo.
• Siskel & Ebert--Academy Awards
  Siskel & Ebert take a look at some Academy picks--Forrest Gump, Quiz Show, Nell and a foreign italian film.
• Collenette/Airborne Video
  Minister of Defense David Collenette opens a video store featuring the military's greatest hazing hits.
• Nursery Books Censored
  Sandra Finsterwald hosts a children's show about books seized at the border.
• Kosher's Korner--Brian Williams
  Special Guest Brian Williams uses a telestrator to illustrate OJ Simpson's strategy using football terms.
• Videopinion--Stage Fright
  A man on the street is steamed about something until the camera starts rolling.

#2-17, Friday February 24, 1995

• Clinton Visits Chretien
  US President Bill Clinton and wife Hillary visit Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien for an afternoon jog around Ottawa.
• RSP Commercial 2
• Bouchard Returns
  Hana Gartner interviews Bloc Quebecois Lucien Bouchard after his return to public life.
• Venture--Credit Rating
  Bank President Gord Thiessen and host Robert Scully chat about Canada's financial situation.
• Susan Powter & Tony Little
• Jock McBile--Deficit
  Jock shows us how we got to our present debt-lemma from former Prime Ministers Pierre Trudeau to Brian Mulroney.
• Preston Woos Elsie
  Preston Manning tries to woo Conservative MP Elsie Wayne into joining the Reform Party.

#2-18, Friday March 3, 1995

• Budget '95
  Finance Minister Paul Martin talks about his latest federal budget.
• CBC Budget Cuts Announcement
  CBC Executive in Charge of Something announces the latest round of budget cuts.
• CNN-Ken From Hairworld
  Bobbie DiBatista and Ken assess hairstyles at the OJ Simpson trial.
• Canadian Moment
  On the table: Budget 1995, Air Travel agreement, President of CBC steps down.
• Nunziata Rewrite
  Liberal non-cabinet minister (but he's not bitter) John Nunziata looks at the retiring pensions of former MP's.
• Parizeau Sovereignty Hearings
  Average Quebecers speak their minds on separation, whether Jacques likes it or not.
• The Loony Channel
• Gender Bias Theatre
  Man and woman meet on park bench and talk about the sexes in this latest instalment.

#2-19, Friday March 10, 1995

• Sweatin' To The Top Stories
  Richard Simmons shakes his booty to the following tunes:
• Sheila Copps--Story Time
  Storyteller Sheila Copps reads a children's book entitled "The Liberals little red book of lies".
• Amazing Discoveries--2000 Flushes
  2000 Flushes inventor Al Eisen displays his tasteless wares on Mike Levy's "Amazing Discoveries".
• Ottawa Private Eye
• Member For Kicking Horse Pass
• Memory Lapse Talk Show
  Host Carson Dial has a few guests whose names he can't seem to remember who are there to talk about.... something.
• Mr. Grimble
  A man tries to call 911 with a bottle stuck on his finger and comes up against the dreaded voice messaging service.
• The Canadian Way

#2-20, Friday March 17, 1995

• News From Away With Jimmy & Seamus O'Toole
  Current events discussed include Turbot, Mike Harcourt and the new upcoming $2 coin.
• Stan's Long Distance Co.
  Tired of paying those monopolies through the nose? Try Stan's Long Distance!
• Chretien's Corner
  Mr. "fer sure on dat" talks tough with Ron Maclean.
• Manning--Postcard
  Mr. Manning goes to Washington.
• PTN--Tobin Patrol
  Pamela Wallin interviews Brian Tobin in a trawler as he prepares to deal with Spanish overfishing in Canadian waters.
• Stumpy Tom Sings Again
  Stumpy Tom is "inbred and worry free.... just like the Royal family".
• Church Of The Holy Pistol
  The good reverend thinks that true believers should pack a pistol.
• Headache Sufferers
  Headache suffers group meet to find some relief from the noisy world.

#2-21, Friday March 24, 1995

• Canadians In Spain
  An isolated Canadian couple return from a long trip and stop by in a Spanish restaurant, unawares of the current tension between Canada and Spain.
• CNN Headline News--2025
  Ongoing coverage of the OJ Simpson trial.
• Canadian Moment
  For the last time this season, the gang gathers to talk about the rail system, Michael Jordan, Silken Laumann and the Queen in South Africa.
• House Of Commons Awards
  Hosts Sheila Copps and Herb Gray present golden doughnut awards to outstanding MPs in Parliament.
• Gilbert Smythe Bite-Me--Academy Awards
  Gilbert tries to come up with some deserving nominees, but just can't seem to find any.
• And It Was Good
  A holy man preaches about St. Jean of Chretien from atop a mountain.
• Spanish Fishing Chicken Cannon
  The chicken cannon takes aim at some Spanish fishing trawlers. (bowling for trawlers)

Instant Classics # 2, Friday March 31, 1995

• Parizeau State Of Province Address (#2-, , 1995)
• Sally Struthers--Jobs (#2-15, February 10, 1995)
• Siskel & Ebert--Academy Awards (#2-16, February 17, 1995)
• Mister Rogers' Cablehood (#2-11, January 13, 1995)
• PTN--Bacteria (#2-, , 1995)
• Newfoundland Lighthouse (#2-13, January 27, 1995)
• Political Rich Couple (#2-14, February 3, 1995)

Instant Classics # 3, Friday April 7, 1995

• CNN--Ken From Hairworld (#2-02, , 1995)
• Jock McBile--The Deficit (#2-07, , 1995)
• Car Weasel (#2-06, , 1995)
• Ottawa Private Eye (#2-07, , 1995)
• RSP Commercial (#2-13, January 27, 1995)
• Blind Willy Feldman (#2-16, February 17, 1995)